Downstream

And I'm sure you're right.

I'm also sure that by next year, Peak Oil will have been subverted by aliens giving us new tech, Korea will be re-united, Taiwan will fight a war with China and win, women will be able to fertilize themselves, I'll be the President of Senegal, and the moon will become our new source of high-grade cheese.

Tomorrow many of us will be going back to school instead of sitting at home and slacking our asses out. From where I'm sitting at the computer, I'm grateful. For the past years I've been spending my holidays in front of the computer playing some game or another. Each day varies so little from the next that your weeks become a blur and at the end of it, I feel like I've just wasted my time. The game's aren't bad, but the lifestyle is, thanks to my lack of social activities to liven it up.

It's just part of who I am, at least right now. The epic phailure at connecting with society, that is. But I didn't need to spend the days after my holidays regretting that I didn't do something constructive. Should have got into more arguments, completed more video projects, written more stories.

And now it's a bit too late. After this quick chiongthrough of O Levels, we get one last long slack period and then we'll be thrown into the slammer marked "JC/Poly/ITE". And then NS/working life. And we'll never be kids again, given an entire fucking month just to sit around in our comfy homes doing whatever we want even if we bullshat through the first half of the year. For me, no longer can I nap in lessons. In FSV, I expect a big shitload of it to be relevant to me. It's not like F&N or Computer Studies where you can reassure yourself that if you mug and memorize it doesn't matter if you take the lesson seriously, or not really learn anything. In Poly I'm going to be doing real, relevant things.

And soon I'll lose all those little things I could do as a child: commit a crime and only get a harsh warning, joke about disease and death, make friends with a member of the opposite sex and not have any sexual tension because the sexist laws of society haven't dug in yet (this is why single-sex primary and secondary schools are stupid), have parents to fall back on(already lost this one), and pretend that staying single is cool (it's not).

Right now I can say "it's scary" but soon enough everyone will tell you that you have to suck it up because you're not a kid anymore, you're an adult. And you've left years behind. It's scary.

Keep the Pebble Fort up guys.